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“If your mother says she loves you, check it out,” is a well-known journalism adage, but it’s also good advice for anyone getting ready to drop a few controversial truth bombs, particularly from the floor of the U.S. House of Representatives. Apparently, Dallas U.S. Rep. Jasmine Crockett, or at least her staff, hasn’t heard it. That might explain why right-leaning media swiftly moved to point out how badly she put her foot in her mouth with a statement she made from the House on the day it voted nearly unanimously to ask the Justice Department to release all of its files from the investigation of convicted sex offender and financier Jeffrey Epstein.
“Jasmine Crockett, Reckless Moron,” was the headline in the National Review, and sure, it’s the National Review and she’s a Democrat, but … ouch.
“Folks who also took money from somebody named Jeffrey Epstein, as I had my team dig in very quickly, Mitt Romney,” Crockett said. “The NRCC. Lee Zeldin. George Bush. WinRed. McCain-Palin. Rick Lazio. I just want to be clear, if this is the standard that we gonna make, just know we’re gonna expose it all. And know that the FEC filings, they are available for everyone to review.”
Yeah, they are, in quite a bit of detail. For example, a search of the Federal Election Commission website of campaign donors since Jan. 1, 2000, pulled up 763 donations under the name Jeffrey Epstein. There were at least a couple of doctors, a lawyer, the owner of a wine business, a business executive at a large home improvement chain and a California professor, among others.
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Money From Beyond
There were even tiny purported donations from THE Jeffrey Epstein, including one listing his occupation as “child molester” in 2025, to both Democratic and Republican PACs. Seeing as he hanged himself in 2019, we suspect those might be hoaxes, unless hell puts strict limits on Venmo transfers. Maybe Crockett’s team can check into that.
Zeldin, former GOP congressman and current head of the EPA, also received a donation from beyond the grave in 2020, at least according to Team Crockett. Unfortunately for those with hopes for an afterlife, Zeldin seems to be one of the few Trump appointees who is not a fool and pointed out that his donation came from a doctor and frequent GOP contributor.
Legit slow-clapped by a Trump appointee. Double ouch.
We did a little quick digging ourselves, and it looks like most, if not all, of the donations came from non-molesting Epsteins, though we did find quite a few from the bad Epstein, former partner in the firm Marjorie Capital LLC. Lots of Democratic beneficiaries.
Obviously, there’s only one thing to be done here: All the other Jeffrey Epsteins in America need to change their names. If that’s just too much to expect, maybe Crockett can add someone with a journalism background to her team to help with fact-checking. There are plenty on the market these days.
