A Touch of Intra-Mexican Hatred

Dear Mexican: Why is it that people from Chihuahua and Monterrey are such jackasses? They cross the border and act as if their cagada does not stink. They eat at all-you-can-eat $6.99 buffets and still want to take a plate to go for their abuela and primos. They stay at…

In Search of Valley Ranch’s “Urban Sophisticates”

Welcome to Alice Column, in which Alice Laussade writes stories about things on (roughly) the same day of (roughly) every week, making it (roughly) a column. Got an idea for a column? Start your own blog and write it up, you lazy shit. The Dallas Morning News has definitively ranked…

Attention New Bands: Chill, For These Are the Best of Times

Are you a musician? Is your group having issues? Ask Fan Landers! Critic Jessica Hopper has played in and managed bands, toured internationally, booked shows, produced records, worked as a publicist, and is the author of The Girls’ Guide to Rocking, a how-to for teen ladies. She is here to…

How to Smoke at Shows, Now that It’s Not Cool Anymore

Every week Gavin will be presenting a guide to basic notions of common sense he feels are sometimes lacking from various aspects of the world of music. Also, he’s British, and they’re polite, right? After Rubber Gloves Rehearsal Studios banned smoking to an overwhelmingly positive reaction this week, we thought…

Who’s White? Who Isn’t?

Dear Mexican: I was struck by something you said in a recent column about how Mexicans can make Americans like Mexicans: “We called ourselves Spanish, we considered ourselves white.” I’m Mexican, and I consider myself “white” because I’m not black or red or Asian. People from Spain are Caucasian. But…

Will the Bush Library Reveal Any Secrets?

Last week the city’s only daily newspaper published a package of three opinion pieces about the new George W. Bush presidential library in Dallas and the effect it will or will not have on the city’s image. They all wound up saying it would put us on the map one…

The Charmin Bears Must Die

Welcome to Alice Column, in which Alice Laussade writes stories about things on (roughly) the same day of (roughly) every week, making it (roughly) a column. Got an idea for a column? Start your own blog and write it up, you lazy shit. You were innocently watching crappy reality television…

How do We Book a Tour?

Are you a musician? Is your group having issues? Ask Fan Landers! Critic Jessica Hopper has played in and managed bands, toured internationally, booked shows, produced records, worked as a publicist, and is the author of The Girls’ Guide to Rocking, a how-to for teen ladies. She is here to…

How Joey Bada$$ Almost Ruined His Career Over a Poster Layout

Your ungratefulness sickens me RT @joeybadass_: If I’m under Trinidad James I’m not doing the Under The Influence Tour. Straight— Rodney Mac (@RappersRActors) April 22, 2013 Joey Bada$$ is under the influence of blog hype. Monday, the New York rap wunderkind, caused quite a stir when he reacted publicly to…

Brooke Humphries: Dance Mogul, Dallas Music Lover, NASCAR Fan

We’ve looked in on Brooke Humphries before, and we’ll probably do it again, but we wanted to check in with her from an angle of local support this time. Humphries, in addition to owning stakes in both Barcadia locations, Beauty Bar, It’ll Do Dance Club and new coffee joint Mudsmith,…

How Can You Learn More about Ranchera?

Dear Mexican: I have always liked ranchera music. As of late, I have wanted to get deeper into it as far as the history, the culture and especially the songs and lyrics. I was wondering if you know a good book or two or website that I can check out…