The Magic Touch

Carol Reed, the political consultant, told another staff member here at the Dallas Observer that I was “a man without a country” because nobody I liked for mayor got into the runoff election. I like it. Call me the “Flying Dutchman of Bryan Parkway.” It’s because I made the horrible…

Jim Cracks Open His Wickipedia Again

We imagine this is how Wick Allison looks — and feels — whenever he comes to Unfair Park and sees that Jim’s written another Trinity River project item. Wick Allison posted an item over on FrontBurner purporting to explain how Rep. Eddie Bernice Johnson was only telling a wily lie…

You, Snooze. We Lose.

So this morning with trembling hands I pluck my daily Dallas Morning News up off the dewy lawn, slip it from the bag and — at the risk of showing myself to my neighbors in my Tartan plaid bathrobe and bedhead hair — ask myself the question: “Can they possibly,…

Ask a Mexican!

Dear Mexican, I have no problem with immigrants. My grandparents were Dutch on one side and Irish on the other—but they came here legally, through Ellis Island. What I can’t stand are a bunch of fence-hopping, river-wading illegals telling me I owe them a free education, free health care, and…

Laura’s Goons

OK, I approach a polling place in Far North Dallas on Frankford Road where I see a representative of Mayor Laura Miller out front. He appears to be fast asleep. The Laura Miller representative is sprawled loosely over a lawn chair in front of the door to a city rec…

Blocked by the Blockers, Jim Could Find No Love on Saturday

I spent Saturday going around to polling places trying to talk to the “blockers” hired by Mayor Laura Miller and others to keep people from signing petitions for a referendum on the Trinity River toll road. I consider myself a halfway decent street reporter, so I was very frustrated that…

?????? ? ??????? ??????????? ?????????: ??????? ???????, ???????

This morning The Dallas Morning News publishes its big front page-editorial page diatribe against having a referendum on the Trinity River toll road. It’s an exercise in truly classic Morning News Pravda Sovietski journalism. Makes me feel like I’m back at the Dallas Times Herald. So, for your edumification and…

Well, Dallas Has Always Wanted to be Like San Francisco

C’mon, there’s no reason the Trinity can’t kinda, sorta look like this, right? My brother, Bill Schutze, lives in a high-rise condo tower above the San Francisco Bay. He has been reading my stuff about Angela Hunt and her doughty band of battlers who are fighting to save the Trinity…

Road Rage

Dallas Mayor Laura Miller has conceded to me that the toll road under design for the Trinity River project is a bad road. “The city manager and I have complained to the North Texas Tollway Authority and told them to fix it,” she said in an exchange of e-mails. “We…

Ask a Mexican!

Dear Readers, Gracias, gracias, gracias for ustedes who bought the Mexican’s book last week (deportation for those who haven’t). I’ve done mucho national press because of the interest; the list so far includes Talk of the Nation, FOX News Live, Paula Zahn Now, The Tom Leykis Show, The Glenn Beck…

Laura Miller Takes a Candide-like Journey Toward the Truth

What was it the mayor said last week? Oh, yes: The truth shall set you free. Read to the end of Jim’s column, where you will find nothing but the truth. On February 25, 2007, at the Fourth Annual Trinity Commons Foundation Membership Luncheon at the Wyndham Anatole Hotel, Mayor…

Ask a Mexican!

Dear Mexican, I’m a gringa married to a mexicano, and we have a 3-year-old son. His family is wonderful for the most part, and they adore my son, but as he is getting older, his tos are trying to “toughen him up” and make him more macho. So far, they’ve…

Fresh Eyes

In recent weeks the call for a referendum on the Trinity River toll road has come to the center of the Dallas mayoral election. At the end of last week, The Dallas Morning News said in an editorial that Tom Leppert and Sam Coats were the two top contenders, but…

Mayor to Schutze: “You Are Wrong.”

Earlier today, Jim Schutze wrote that Mayor Laura Miller “directly misled the public” concerning the design of the Trinity Parkway. This afternoon, the mayor responds. Schutze, you are wrong. The four-lane Trinity Parkway is precisely what the City of Dallas plans to build. We worked hard to forge a compromise…

Russell Fish Has Worst Idea Ever. Ever.

And you thought I didn’t have any right-wing friends! Russell Fish, education gadfly and high-tech inventor extraordinaire, has organized a little effort aimed at teaching the kids at Virginia Tech not to be such wusses next time. In Russell’s view, it is not the American way for men-folk, even if…

Laura Miller and Bill Ceverha, Cutting Down a Tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G

Bill Ceverha’s the mayor’s new best friend, we guess because Tom DeLay won’t return his calls. Laura Miller, our tree-climbing mayor, is planning one of her mom-and-apple-pie press conferences Monday in Fretz Park under the heartwarming motto, “Sink the Petition/Save the Trinity.” It’s an effort to stamp out the petition…