Eden’s Shameful Pass at “High Tea” Tempts an Englishman to Sin

Sometimes a brisket-loving expatriate Brit just needs a taste of home, so we’ve sent our Englishman in BBQ Sauce on a trek to sample Dallas’ version of cream tea. We hope Anglo-American relations will withstand the stress. Deep down, I knew that Maudee’s, with its understanding of appropriate tea and…

“Bohemian Rhapsody” Through The Ears of a Child

Puscifer, fronted by Tool and A Perfect Circle’s Maynard James Keenan, have just released the adorably named EP Donkey Punch The Night. On it, there is, for some reason, a cover of “Bohemian Rhapsody.” You might be expecting Maynard to do something a bit industrial with it, but no, it’s…

Dallas Does Cream Tea? Bad Mistake, Dallas.

Cream Tea. It’s very important to British people. That’s why I capitalized each of the two delightful words that make it up. It’s also extremely straightforward. Upon possession of English Breakfast Tea (which we just call “tea”) and acquisition of a scone (I’m not sure what level I need to…

Horse Meat — You Say Problem, I Say Opportunity

“I’m so hungry I could eat a horse” took on entirely new meaning in the UK this week, as it turns out many people had unknowingly fulfilled their declaration of hunger by eating what they believed to be low-quality beef. Predictably, this has led to outrage across the land, as…

“Leviathan” Is the Best Metal Album of the Millennium

Many “best of metal” lists recently have overlooked an album which is, in my generally poor opinion, not only worthy of a place on these lists, but the best, most interesting, and most exciting metal album released this millennium. This album is Mastodon’s “Leviathan”. This album has so much going…

The xx

Achingly hip Londoners the xx have a two-night stay at The Granada this week, meaning twice as many Dallasites will be swept away by songs from their now-ubiquitous debut album and the recently released Coexist. We’re kind of lucky to get two consecutive shows from one of the world’s hottest…

Oink And Moo Barbecue Will Kill Us All, But Especially Me

The concept of a mobile barbecue food truck, which may appear next to me at any moment in any situation, is a health danger on a par with snakes, shoddily constructed buildings and being fired out of a cannon into the sun. Especially snakes. I really hate snakes. Previously, I…

The Worst Supergroups Of All Time

A supergroup is a difficult project to make a success of. The work of previous band members overshadows any new material, and although it brings a ready-made fan base, it also brings unreasonably high expectations. Not only that, those that make up the new band might have similarly unreasonably high…