Horror Remix takes out all the B.S. story lines and lame dialogue leading up to the stabbings and scariness that we all want from a horror movie and distills each film down to 30 to 40 minutes of pure gore, sex, cheesiness, stabbing and awesome. This week, Horror Remix focuses…
I originally heard about Off The Bone Barbeque because of its baby back ribs, but I’m anti-baby-eating, so I opted for the smoked sausage sandwich (for $5.75) and a side of coleslaw ($1.75) with an A&W root beer ($1.25). Recently, Off The Bone closed in its patio and it’s even…
Do you have a pair of balls just begging to be scared off? At 7:30 p.m. Friday, check out Thrillvania Thrill Park (2330 County Road 138 at I-20 and Wilson Road in Terrell), home to eight different haunted attractions housed on almost 50 acres of land. Named one of the…
Midnight this Friday (or Saturday) see Israel Luna’s Ticked-Off Trannies with Knives at the Inwood Theatre, 5458 West Lovers Lane. Shot in Dallas, the “transploitation” film is about a group of transgender entertainers who are brutally attacked and decide to get revenge. It’s Kill Bill with bigger tits and better…
Bars on a restaurant’s windows = lunch costs less than 10 bucks. It’s just a theory, but if a restaurant’s cheap-ass owners went for bars over an actual alarm system, there’s no way they’re gonna charge you an arm and a leg to eat lunch. I walked into window-barred Mai’s…
Stephan Pyles wants your cheap ass to feel fancy. That must be why he opened Samar in the middle of downtown, put a buncha hookahs out front, hired hosts in suits who insist on opening the door for you and did a million other things so that when you look…
Do you like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger? Do you like to shake and bake? Is laughing at French people a real good time? Do you think “diablo” is Spanish for “fighting chicken?” If you love Talladega Nights like Kate Gosselin loves stupid hair and paparazzi, imagine…
SYTYCD? is coming to town this Wednesday!! Ohmahgady’all!! No, SYTYCD? isn’t an acronym for a sexually transmitted disease, it’s So You Think You Can Dance?! 7:30 p.m. Wednesday, the live tour of So You Think You Can Dance? hits Verizon Theatre at Grand Prairie (1001 Performance Place in Grand Prairie)…
Walking into The Dock restaurant at Fair Park early Labor Day morning, you smell nothing but cotton candy, grease and arrhythmia. Mmmmmm. Take in a nice, deep breath of impending diabetes, y’all. It’s time for the final judging of The Big Tex Choice Awards. After years of experimenting and weeks…
If your nanny made kickass matching outfits for your seven kids out of nasty curtains, you’d probably bone her. Especially if all your other bone-able options were super scary Nazi chicks. But, would you be a total douche and make her call you “Captain” like that bag o’ dongs Georg…
I was thinking about hitting up Offshore’s Nextdoor for a late lunch, so I perused its menu online. As soon as I came across “nap 30” on their menu, I knew I had to check the place out. Unfamiliar with the term? I’ll school you: “What time is it after…
12 Burgers is named after its signature burger, which comes with 12 toppings: bacon, cheese, avocado, sauteed onions, mushrooms, bell peppers, pickles, jalapeños, lettuce, tomato, Thousand Island dressing and mustard. Personally, I think that’s a pretty dumb name because I wouldn’t count Thousand Island and mustard as toppings. (I’d make…
American Idol almost-winner, Adam Lambert, has a single out you might have heard called “Whataya Want From Me?” Adam, we’re so glad you asked. Adam: Hey, what do you want from me? Me: How about 20 bucks? Adam: What do you want from meeeee? Me: A rainbow made of puppies…
The Burger Spot brags that it only serves fresh, grass-fed, local beef. Which is great because everyone knows if something’s organic, then it’s zero calories. Brang on the cheese and bacon, y’all! Burger Spot has several burger options, from The Alamo Burger (1/3-pound beef, refried beans, Fritos, onions, cheddar and…
We love Hatch. We’re not talking tax-evading, naked Richard Hatch–we’re talking hot Hatch chile roasted over an open flame and immediately thrown on a burger, diced into salsa or just straight shoved in mouth. The 15th Anniversary Hatch Chile Festival is in full swing at Central Market and this year,…
Apparently, Paula Deen has been hookin’ up with Serta. Or, she paid them an awful lotta money to let her fulfill her Me In PJs On A Serta Showroom Floor fantasy. What’s the appeal of having Paula Deen as a celebrity spokeswoman for your mattress brand? Were the execs like,…
Dark Chocolate, you are such a candy aisle whore now. I love you, Dark Chocolate, but you used to be special. On Halloween, I used to get all hyped to see Hershey’s Special Dark in the fancy gold wrapper in those bags of Hershey’s miniatures (eating order was always Special…
After watching Food, Inc. I did what anyone would do: I went out for some fast food. My first thought upon entering Zaxby’s? It has to be good if there’s an old man that’s so desperate to eat some of these wings that he’s wheelin’ his oxygen tank into this…
At 7:05 p.m. Monday through Thursday, you can see our Texas Rangers swing sticks and throw balls at the Minnesota Twins at Rangers Ballpark in Arlington (1000 Ballpark Way). Important information: Wednesday night is dollar hot dog night. So, either plan to show up and eat a ton of hot…
Ask 20 people in Dallas, “Where’s the best pizza in town?” and you’ll get at least 20 different answers. And most of those places charge ridiculously outrageous prices for a slice. Apparently, people think that in order to make good pizza in D-Town they have to charge hooker blow jay…
“Love Is A Battlefield.” “Hit Me With Your Best Shot.” “We Belong.” “Heartbreaker.” Sure, you’ve heard these songs sung (and/or whistled) by your mom, by poseurs on American Idol, by 12-year-olds in their Flingy McDingdong Rockband bands and by every possible combination of drunk chick plus off-key at karaoke night…
Uhh… I don’t get it, Texadelphia. I thought for sure it was more important that I find your queso than that I find God. But, OK. I’ll go find God. Thanks?…
